Shattered
by Charlie'sAngel656
Summary: *PG13 for language and implications* *Finally Reposted after format editing*
1. Shattered Beginnings

Disclaimer: Let's be honest with ourselves. Would I be a broke student writing fic if I *owned* this? Nuh-uh, don't think so.  
  
A/n: Takes place after Rising  
  
A/n2: (I swear I'll leave you alone after this) A note for all those diehard M/L-ers out there: I know it's hard to get inspired these days, what w/ the flood of M/A fic and all, but we have to stay strong! If you want reviews, review other M/L fic.I know how hard it is to get reviews, trust me (*hint*).and thanks to Teris Xenite for the suggestion there! ***************************************************************** The night was cold, and there was a brownout here, in the dead of winter, but Max didn't notice any of it. All she noticed was the wine glass in her hand, and the candles all around, and the man next to her with his eyes boring into her soul.  
  
"So anyway, Bling's been.Max? Max, you with me?"  
  
"Huh? Uh.yeah. Guess I just zoned out a minute." Can't tell him the truth, can I? Nah, that would be too weird. "Yeah, guess I just got lost in your eyes." Uh-huh, that would work.  
  
"So, anything new with you lately?"  
  
Damn, now he's acting all concerned.doesn't he know how hard it already *is* to not love him? He has to make it harder? "Nothin' really. Just your run-of-the-mill escaped government project life." She added a bitter laugh to the end, turning her own pity into a joke. "How 'bout you? Anything new in the 'fight against evil' and all that?"  
  
"Nothing as far as I can tell. My informants have been kind of.quiet lately. Maybe the world's finally shaping up."  
  
Max shook her head, a sarcastic grin slipping into place. "Now, Logan. You should know not to jinx yourself like that. Or me, for that matter." She stretched gracefully, just as her pager blared. She returned Original Cindy's call on her newly acquired cell phone.  
  
"Talk to me, girl."  
  
"Hey, boo." Cindy struggled to have her voice heard above the bar's crowd. "You gonna be here any time tonight?"  
  
"Ahh.I forgot, Cin. I'm over at-"  
  
"Logan's, I know, I know. Ain't you always? And you say you two 'aren't like that'."  
  
"We're not! Look, I'll make it up to you. I'll be there tomorrow night, and you'll have my undivided attention."  
  
"You promise? Not that I don't trust you, but, y'know."  
  
"I promise. I'll be home later, alright?"  
  
"Fine, boo. I'll see you."  
  
"Lata."  
  
Max looked at Logan apologetically, just as the brownout ended. "That was OC. I think I'm supposed to go pacify her now. Gotta blaze."  
  
"Right. I'll see you tomorrow?"  
  
"Gonna have to make it Wednesday. She's feeling a little left out; I promised her some one-on-one."  
  
"Okay, then Wednesday it is." Logan accompanied her to the door, touching her arm for the briefest second before she left. ***************************************************************** Just as Max entered her apartment, she felt a familiar twitch at the base of her neck. Dammit, not now! She tried to beat the seizure; tried to make it to her meds before it went full-blown, but she couldn't. She dropped to the floor an instant after the shakes began.  
  
*Flash* Max watched her foster father beating Lucy while she hid in the closet  
  
*Flash* Max cowered under the force of her foster father's blows  
  
*Flash* Max watched the effect the Pulse was having on the rest of the country.I knew he'd do something like this! She remembered, based on information in her file, that today was her birthday. This was a message, I know it.  
  
*End Flash*  
  
Max woke to find herself back on Logan's couch. "L-Logan?"  
  
"Hey, you. Feeling better?"  
  
"How'd I get here?" She relaxed into his arms, allowing him to hold her. "Cindy called me.you had a bad seizure. We thought you might be more comfortable here."  
  
"I.did I say anything?"  
  
"Something about.Lucy?"  
  
"My foster sister." She remembered her other flashbacks; knew she had to tell Logan. "Logan? This.this is kinda a weird question, but bear with me, alright?"  
  
"Of course.what is it, Max?"  
  
"Where were you when the Pulse hit?"  
  
*****************************************************************' And here we reach the end. This is the point where I tell you to review, because I do *not* beg. Okay, maybe just this once.please review??  
  
A/n: I realize that my chapters are usually horribly short.I just get writer's block (or on rare occasions, I just can't stop writing) if I keep going. I promise that future chapters will be long (not the next one, because I already have it written)  
  
A/n: Preview: in the next chapter, we learn more about our characters' pasts, and how Logan's parents died (and yes, I may deviate away from information provided by the show- i.e. Max's birthday- but it works for the purposes of the story)  
  
And now you get to go review! 


	2. Shattered Memories

Disclaimer: See Part 1 Summary: Pasts are explored as a new future is constructed. ***************************************************************** "Where were you when the Pulse hit?"  
  
"When the Pulse hit? God, that was a long time ago.I was.on my parents' yacht. I was twenty-two at the time, a new journalism major at Yale- that really pissed my dad off, by the way- and I had a new girlfriend. Claire, I think her name was. She was pre-law, all the right breeding. Needless to say, my father's family approved. My mom.she was more of a free spirit. Athletic, gentle, smart.and a complete wise-ass." He laughed softly; a sound Max loved but rarely heard.  
  
"Anyway, the onboard computer navigation system failed and we wrecked. There was a fire.my sister was trapped in one of the bedrooms with the door locked.she was thirteen. By the time we could get the door open, she was gone.my mom was hysterical. She didn't even pay attention to how badly she was hurt; she just wanted to get help for her little girl. When the helicopter finally came, she accepted how injured she was. There were third-degree burns over most of her body. She died of an infection three days later. Their deaths destroyed my father.he didn't die with my family. He lived maybe a year after the accident, but he had a heart attack- not serious, it wouldn't have killed him, but he had another one on the way to the hospital, and that killed him. So I was left alone. I always thought that grief killed my dad." He paused, drawing in a shaky breath. "All three are buried in a small cemetery in Sector Four. I still go there.on their birthdays, and Mother's Day and Father's Day."  
  
"Oh, God, Logan.I'm so sorry." Max gently nuzzled his shoulder, an action she had only recently begun doing.  
  
"There was nothing anyone could've done, Max."  
  
"I could've." Her words were almost lost to him, but he reacted instantly.  
  
"What?"  
  
"I said I could've. The Pulse.see, Logan, Manticore may have been a government-funded group, but they always had connections with terrorism. That group that set off the Pulse? One of Lydecker's closest allies. And the date of the Pulse.my birthday. Five months after the escape, for X5. It was a message. Lydecker knew that it would be easier to catch us if the entire nation was screwed beyond repair, and there was military presence everywhere. We were trained to fold under an established command.but he underestimated our respect for Zack. We wouldn't give up, so he warned us with the Pulse. Warned us that he would hunt us down, that he would chase us until we were either dead or loyal."  
  
"God, Max, that's horrible." He took in the downcast expression on her face. "I don't.I *can't*.blame you. You were just an innocent kid, and you were used by horrible people. But that won't happen again, I swear. As long as I'm here, and your siblings, you'll always be safe."  
  
"When you say used, you have no idea how close to the truth you are." Max muttered.  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"At night.keep in mind, I was just an eight-year-old girl when we escaped, and I didn't know anything but obedience.at night, guards would come into my cell.and, well, I'll let your imagination handle the rest. They told us it was part of the 'project' and that we had to obey them, or we'd be put in solitary for disrespecting a senior officer. So I did.and then, the next morning, I asked Tinga about it. She was the oldest female X5. And do you know what she said? 'You're not alone, Maxie. It happens to all of us. It's been happening, and it'll keep on happening.' And then she patted my arm and sent me back to training. I just.I couldn't believe it. She was my big sister, and she was telling me to shrug off something like that.I mean, I know now that she was just being obedient, but it really hurt then. But that's what I did. I shrugged it off, and I went back into line, and I completed my training."  
  
"Max.I can't even imagine what that must have been like. You know that can't happen again, right? You're safe here, and protected, and there are people who love you." /I'm gonna hunt down every single one of those bastards and make them pay for what they've done to her. Shit.did I just say *love*?/  
  
"Love me?"  
  
/Yup, I said love./ "Right. Love. I love you, Max." He added to his previous statement hastily, having seen the deer-in-headlights expression in her eyes. "You don't have to say anything, you know. All I ask is that you let me love you."  
  
"No.Logan, I.when I'm with you, I feel better, and more safe, and more loved, than I do anywhere else. I feel like you protect me more than all the soldiers in the world. And over time, I've built these walls around my heart, and I've become afraid to open up too easily. But around you.around you, those walls come down, and I can be myself. So I guess what I'm trying to say is.I love you, Logan."  
  
Logan kissed her gently, first on her forehead, then a slow, soft kiss on her lips. He glanced at the clock, his eyes widening. "Max, it's after curfew."  
  
"Can I.can I stay in the guestroom?" Max met his gaze shyly, as if she was afraid everything they had just experienced would go away.  
  
"Of course. You have some of your things in there, right?"  
  
She nodded, pulling herself gently out of his embrace and kissing him briefly. "So I'll see you tomorrow?"  
  
"Right. Good night, Max."  
  
"'Night, Logan." Max padded softly into the guestroom, unable to wipe a soft smile off her face. Logan loves me.Logan loves me.and I love him.and we both know.Logan loves me.Logan loves me.God, I really need to shut up. She climbed gently into the bed, comfortable and tired enough to sleep after the seizures and revelations of the night. ***************************************************************** And another infamously short chapter comes to an end.what happens now? Is Max's interaction with Manticore really behind her? As always, I ask (NOT beg) for reviews! 


	3. Shattered Family

Disclaimer: See part 1 A/n: God, this is the fastest I've ever written in my life.only, I have this habit of coming up with chapters in the middle of my government class, so I can't write them down, so I lose them.but bear with me.  
  
A/n2: I *did* try to make this one longer, but like I said in part 1, I have trouble with long chapters.lol just read and review. Also, to all the people who mentioned the formatting for chapter one: I had it in a good format (or so I thought) when I wrote it, but when I posted, it came out in a different format totally. So I *will* repost! And thanks for all the reviews!!  
  
A/n3: This took longer than I expected, because I found other formatting problems that needed fixing in *all* my chapters, so I'm doing that now. From now on: -Max's thoughts are in -Logan's thoughts are in // -other characters thoughts are in ^^ *****************************************************************  
  
When Max woke on Tuesday morning, she heard Logan's coffee maker running. She also heard the steady click-click-click of his computer. Odd how comforting something so annoying can be. She approached him warily, wondering if his feelings could possibly have changed overnight. Come on, Max, that's ridiculous. She leaned over by him to glance at the screen. Yahoo! Pool? Hmm. "Morning, you."  
  
"Hey. There's food in the kitchen, if you want it."  
  
"*If* I want it? Are you crazy?" She made her way into the kitchen, greeted by the smells of pancakes and coffee.  
  
Her pager beeped again while she was eating. Cindy.what does she want? She suddenly realized that today was a weekday, and that it was quite possibly later than she thought. "Uh, Logan? What time is it?" Please don't be late.Please don't be late.  
  
"Nine-thirty, why?"  
  
"Crap. I-I gotta go. I'll see you tomorrow?" She breezed through the office, picking up her jacket and kissing him lightly, leaving before he could react.  
  
Logan heard the door click shut, pulling him from his thoughts. /Max kissed me./ It had taken him a moment to react, and now he sat in his office, one hand on his lips, wondering whether she would return the next day. /She won't run, will she? God, I hope not./  
  
Max arrived at Jam Pony, fully expecting to be bombarded by questions about the previous night. Just as she expected, Cindy pounced on her with an amazing lack of subtlety.  
  
"So, Boo, what when down last night? You an' Moneybags do anything I wouldn't do?" She grinned broadly, sure she had the right answer.  
  
"Well, ah.nothin' you *would* do, actually, and nothin' Kendra would either. Basically, we figured out that we were in love with each other.and then we talked a lot, and then I slept over. In the guest room."  
  
"Damn, Boo. Didn't expect that kinda thing.just glad you two are over that whole deal about 'we're not like that'. You actually think anybody believed that?"  
  
"We were really that transparent?" Max blushed, although she already knew that her friends had realized her feelings for Logan long before she herself had.  
  
"Crystal clear, shuga. This doesn't mean you're gonna be spending 24/7 over there from now on, does it? 'Cause y'know, transgenic escapee or not, you're my girl, and I've never been too fond of sharing."  
  
"We'll always be tight, Cin."  
  
"Promise?"  
  
"On Lydecker's cold, dead body." Max hugged her roommate briefly. Boy, this emotion thing comes easy once you get used to it. She was about to open her locker when she heard a familiar sound. It was a whistle, a series of whistles that she recognized. Four whistles, a pause, five more, a pause, and a final two. Zack's code.  
  
She chorused the standard reply, an action that she didn't even think about. 5-9-9. When she saw her *brother* standing outside, she pulled Cindy along after her. "Normal, we need a personal day."  
  
"Not unless one of you is literally bleeding to death." Normal knew that he wouldn't be able to stop them from leaving anyway, docked pay or not. "Fine, fine, go on, but I expect a doctor's note tomorrow!" The last sentence was called after their rapidly retreating forms.  
  
When they got to Max and OC's apartment, Zack seemed to notice the other woman for the first time. "Original Cindy, right?"  
  
"In the flesh. That would make you Zack?"  
  
"Uhh." He shot a quick glare at Max. "Baby sister?"  
  
"She knows."  
  
"You told? Maxie, that's not exactly maintaining a low profile. The more people-"  
  
"Yeah, yeah, 'the more people who know, the more I can get hurt'. But I had to save her life, which involved letting her in on my little secret." Max brushed off her older brother's criticism easily. "What's the sitch?"  
  
"Just checking up. Zane had a run-in with some goons in L.A., so I thought maybe you or Jondy might have had trouble."  
  
"How long are you here?" Desperate for sibling time, Max was trying to coax him into staying.  
  
"I was gonna leave as soon as I saw you. It's easier that way."  
  
"Easier for what, Zack? Easier for the mission? There *is* no mission! We're not soldiers anymore. Or is it easier on you? Easier for you not to have to deal with me, because you know I don't see you like that? I'm sorry, Zack, but you'll always just be my brother. I love you to death, but not the way I love Lo-" She slammed her hand over her mouth, shocked at how easily she had said those words.  
  
"Logan. Dammit, I should've known. It's always about your precious Miracle Boy, isn't it? How can you love him?! He's an ordinary, Maxie, and he'll get you killed. If you get him captured, they'll torture him 'til he gives away your location, and none of us can afford that. Are you willing to risk all our lives for one man?"  
  
"Yeah, I think I am." Max muttered the words so quietly that Zack almost missed them; even then, he refused to believe them.  
  
"What did you say?" All of Zack's anger exploded. "You would give up everything we have for *him*? I knew it!" He sighed. "I knew he'd convince you that you could have some kind of normal life, and that you'd believe him, and that you'd get hurt eventually. But you know what? Don't come crying to me or the others when he breaks your heart or winds up dead. Because I guarantee you, there won't be a transgenic shoulder in the whole damn world for you to cry on."  
  
"Hey!" Original Cindy butted in angrily, sensing the toll this conversation was having on her friend. "I know you're this big tough soldier-guy or whatever, but you can't just get up in here and start attacking my boo like that. If she's got something good, and you really love her, then I think you'd better be happy for her. God knows she deserves it, after everything you and that hellhole you came from have put her through. And until you can be happy for her, I think you'd better get the hell out of her town."  
  
Zack turned all his anger on her now, glad for a new target. "I don't think so. I don't take orders from civilians."  
  
"Dammit, Zack, why won't you just give up? There are no civilians, and no soldiers, and no chain of command here. We aren't in Manticore anymore. I know the others may be willing to just blindly follow you, but I'm not like that! I have a life, and I have friends, and I have, believe it or not, people who love me. I have a family here, as hard as it might be for you to imagine that people could love a genetically engineered killing machine." Max turned away, still speaking, albeit in quieter volume. "If you can't accept that, then you should just go. You can come back when you've learned what an asshole you are."  
  
"But.Maxie.I." Zack, ever the steel-hearted soldier, was at a loss for words. Original Cindy seized the opportunity, using a trick one of her old girlfriends had taught her. She grabbed his earlobe, pinching it tightly between her fingernails and using it to drag him toward the door.  
  
"You're leaving now. Next time, try something called a telephone." She knew that the more powerful X5 could easily escape, but she had caught him off guard both by the pain brought by the move and the bold nature of her actions, and that shock alone forced him out the door.  
  
When her brother was gone, Max fell into her roommate's arms. "God, how screwed up is he?  
  
"Sorry, girl, but you got one messed up family. Wouldn't be bad if he was just all 'bout you, like I can see he is, 'cause you're not exactly related or nothin'. But see, the creepy thing is how he keeps calling you baby sister and all. Original Cindy just can't feel that." She smoothed back the younger girl's hair, intent on cheering her up. "Now I feel like I gotta do somethin' for my girl so she's not all down on herself. Lemme see those nails."  
  
Max held out her hands for inspection, laughing when her friend scolded her. "Girl, these are not tools! These are nails! You do not use them to fight, or to open various doors, or to.do whatever else it is you do!"  
  
"If they're there, why not? Kick or be kicked in the ass world out there, OC. Gotta take advantage of everything I got to get ahead."  
  
"Damn. Not many people can out-argue Original Cindy, boo, and you've made it an art!" She worked carefully on her friend's nails, finally satisfied that they passed inspection.  
  
"I try." Max eyed her no-fuss manicure, the relief that it didn't look anything like Original's long purple-and-blue nails evident on her face.  
  
"I guess you'll be at Logan's tonight?"  
  
"I.actually, I was thinking I would stay over here. Y'know, do the friend thing?" Max's voice carried an unsure tone, one that was immediately picked up on.  
  
"Girl, what is it? Not that I don't appreciate bein' thought of, but I figured once you and him had somethin', you'd be over there full-time. And you know I'm all for that. Whatever makes you happy, girl."  
  
"I just.what if I shouldn't, y'know? It's not like I came over 24/7 before last night anyway, so would it be weird if I did now? It's not like we've actually said we were going out or anything.and what if he changes his mind?"  
  
"Oh, I get it now. You're having second thoughts, and you think he is too. Well, lemme tell you somethin'. You didn't see him when I called last night. He came runnin' over here, all pretending like he wasn't scared, and just scooped you up and took you back to his place. I have never- never- seen a guy who cared that much about a girl."  
  
"So you think I should go over there."  
  
"Hell, yes! But first we gotta get you all beautified." Original Cindy's eyes held a renewed gleam, something Max was both glad to see and wary of at the same time. She ran back to Max's room, digging through the curtained-off closet space until she found what she needed. She pushed the outfit into Max's arms, pushing her into the bedroom. "You better come out here with *that* outfit on, and no protesting!"  
  
When Max emerged a few minutes later, she was wearing skintight leather pants, her favorite combat boots, and a sheer silver top with just a few extra sparkles to keep everything out of sight. "Cin."  
  
"I know it's girlie, and I know it's.well, to be blunt, sexy as hell, and you're probably not too comfortable with that, but just trust me. That boy won't be able to think straight for a week!" She led Max to the door, pointing out that the sun had set just a few minutes ago. "Now get gone."  
  
***************************************************************** A/n: And this is where I'm ending it. The next chapter is probably going to skip a few months into the future, so that their relationship is developed more. Because while I'm *not* good at writing the beginning of a new relationship, I can write the problems that they face later on! I guess I don't have to tell you to review.but I am anyway, so REVIEW! 


	4. Shattered Existance

A/N: Been a while, I know…but hey, here's another chapter, after going back and reading all the reviews…this chapter is mainly filler, leading up to longer stuff, but I'm tired, so…

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          Max wheeled her Ninja out of its hiding place behind her apartment, eager already to return to Logan.  Girl, you've got it bad.   She moved to straddle the bike, only to have her leg swept out from under her with a low kick that sent her sprawling on the pavement.  "What the hell was *that* for?"

          "*That* was for being worthless transgenic scum…worthless transgenic scum who's worth quite a bit of money to the government."  The voice above her was female, albeit incredibly deep and thick with anger.  Max forgot all thoughts of voices as something sharp punctured her neck and she felt blackness encroaching on her vision.

          "For my mother before me, for my daughters."  Jem paused as she listened to her contact yelling at his driver.  "It is done."

          Minutes later, with a squeal of tires, a black van pulled up at the mouth of the alley, and out stepped two dark-clad figures.  They easily lifted Max into the vehicle.  "The Director will be pleased.  Nice job, Jem."

          "One less transgenic to plague the earth."  Jem replied before disappearing into the darkness.

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          Max groaned as her neck rebelled against the movements of her awakening.  She took in her surroundings silently, with her eyes barely open, to keep her captors- whoever they may be- from realizing her consciousness.  Gray cell.  Bunk.  Ugly-ass gray camo.  Manticore.  

          In spite of her efforts, a blonde woman who looked like she was only a little younger that Lydecker sauntered into the cell, flanked by big, hulking Manticore guards.  Glad I remembered the boys right.  All brawn, no brains.  

          "Well, X5-452…or, Max, is it?  How are we feeling today?"

          "Bite me."  
  


          "Ooh, such *language*, soldier!  Tsk, tsk, that's not really necessary, is it?  I think you'll find your accommodations more than adequate."  She turned away to speak to the guards, and Max just barely heard her.  "Bring her in to Sector 314 for reconditioning at 0400."  With that, she left the cell, abandoning Max, who was lying still on the gray cot that proved the room's only furnishing.

          A short time later- Max estimated that it was no more that ten minutes- another one of the guards appeared in the doorway.  "Guess you expect me to just go with you?  Sorry to break it to you, I wasn't made to follow.  I'm a leader."

          "That's why I have this."  He pressed a button on something that resembled a remote detonator, and Max felt a familiar twitch at the base of her neck.  Damn, they're controlling seizures now!    He held the button long enough to weaken her considerably, and then gripped her arm and dragged her off down the long hall to what the mystery woman had referred to as 'Sector 314'.

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Yes, I'm incorporating S2 stuff…you'll see how it goes.


	5. Shattered Continuance

          A/N: I know it's been a while, and I'm sorry!!! There was a major case of writer's block, and then my computer deleted all my documents, and then the site was down and I couldn't find any of my fics!!  But now I'm back, and (hopefully) as good as ever!

            Disclaimer: Again, as always, not mine…

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            Max struggled against her restraints, shifting her gaze to glare at the woman standing by the wall.  A man in a white coat was doing something to a machine in front of her, and all at once a laser struck her, filling her with unbelievable pain.  Whatever poisons they had injected her with were making it difficult to breath, but she remembered the game well.  Cooperate, and they'd give you the antitoxin.  Don't cooperate, and, well…the soldiers were expendable.

            The torture lasted for what seemed like forever, stretching on until Max felt she would break.  All the while, the pain was accompanied by pictures of her siblings, pictures captioned with insults- "rat"…"scum"…."traitor"…"target".

            When it was finally over, Max fought to keep herself from vomiting, an instinctive reaction to the pain.  The two guards held her arms tightly, parading her past the blonde woman, who made them stop.  She watched Max's expressions with barely controlled glee.  ^Finally, I've managed what that bastard Lydecker never could! ^  She spoke, her tone betraying none of what she was feeling.  "State your designation."

            Max complied, knowing that she was earning some sort of 'prize'.  "X5-452."

            "Very well."  The woman smirked.  "Take her to the X5 block."

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            The X5 block was a group of cells, and Max was pushed inside one, dark and cold.  Moments later, she turned at the sound of the door opening.  Two people entered, walking with military precision.  Max knew that whoever they were, this was designed to hurt her as much as the torture ever could.  All at once, light flooded the room, blinding her for a second.

            The identities of her two guests were revealed when she opened her eyes, and her heart sank.  "Brin….and Ben?!"

            Brin nodded.  "X5-452."

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            I know this was short again, but I promise I'll write as often as I can to make up for it!!


End file.
